BibMe Free Bibliography & Citation Maker - MLA, APA, Chicago, Harvard. The Sallie House haunting is in it'sown class due to the conditions that exist, full-bodied apparitions, and objects flying through the air. Many of us have asked if it’s okay to doubt our faith, but maybe the question should be, is it okay not to doubt. Shouldn’t we all be asking questions about what.
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Yes, Using Porn is Cheating. Here's Why. I’ve heard it said that there are men who don’t look at porn, and then there are men who are breathing. If recent surveys are any indication, porn use has become the norm among men, not the exception. Still, I get a lot of questions from women who are feeling the heartbreaking impact of porn on their marriages. To them porn feels like cheating, and for good reason.
It is. I understand why many don’t think this is true (reasons I’ll address below), but first it is important that I define some terms. By “using porn” I don’t mean merely seeing it. Literally Right Before Aaron (2017) Stream. It’s hard not to walk about in public places or go online without seeing something that is at least meant to titillate the eyes of men. When I say “using” I mean intentionally taking porn in through one’s senses with the intention of being turned on and then, most likely, masturbating or at least getting sexually aroused. By “cheating” I mean that using porn is breaking a vow—either implicitly or explicitly—made to one’s spouse.
This is because marriage is, in part, about sexual exclusivity; it is about “forsaking all others.”The Slippery Porn Slope. Take some steps with me down a morally slippery slope. Step 1: Let’s say I were to visit a prostitute and have sex with her. That would be cheating on my wife.
I assume no one would debate me on this point. Step 2: However, let’s say that when I met with the prostitute we didn’t actually touch each other: I just watched her have sex with someone else while I masturbated in the same room. But just go with it.) Would that be cheating? Both in this case and in the previous case I am seeking the services of a prostituted woman for sexual pleasure—seeking out and enjoying the body of a woman who is not my wife in order to be sexually gratified.
Could a man rightly say, “Yes, I pleasured myself in front of a hooker, but we didn’t touch each other. I stayed faithful to you”? I don’t think so. The pretense of no physical contact doesn’t matter because the action still violates the spirit of the sexual exclusivity. Step 3: However, let’s say I didn’t visit the prostitute in person but only interacted with her online through erotic video chat.
Let’s say I masturbated during the chat session while using the video image as the source of my fantasy. Is this cheating? Has the lack of physical proximity suddenly changed the situation that it is no longer breaking my marriage vow? I don’t think so.
Step 4: Now let’s say that instead of engaging in the video chat live, the prostitute recorded herself for me so I could masturbate at my convenience. Is this still cheating?
Am I now suddenly remaining faithful to my marriage vows because someone hit the record button? That’s just stupid. Step 5: Now let’s say the prostitute has a business card with a fancy title on it: “Pornographic Actress.” She even has a website with a resume listing of all the films she’s been in. Her pimp—I mean, agent—pays taxes and everything.
Totally legit. Let’s say I reach out to this prostitute and pay her to view her recorded videos which she gladly sells me. Is this cheating? Does the change in title and the veneer of professionalism change the nature of the act? No. Step 6: Now let’s say that this entire enterprise is industrialized so that this woman is part of a large network of other prostitutes who are doing the same thing. Much like walking into a brothel, I can pick the woman I want when I want, pay my fee, and enjoy her body for my lustful purposes. Is this cheating? What about the industrialized nature of the product changes the nature of the act?
Nothing. And on this last step we have arrived at what the modern porn industry is. This is why using pornography is cheating. It is engagement with a digital prostitute despite one’s vow to forsake all others.
Hold on, I’m not convinced. I can hear the screeching of mental breaks right about now. Many are thinking, “Wait a second. Something major has shifted between the first scenario and the last. No one sees porn as digital prostitution. If this was the way our culture understood porn, it might be one thing. But very few people who watch porn go online thinking, .
After all, motive and intention count for something when it comes to the promises or vows we make. If I sign a contract saying I will not share proprietary information from my employer, but then forward a work e- mail along to a friend, not knowing it counts as “proprietary,” I’m not guilty of intentionally breaking my promise (even if my employer has grounds to fire me). Someone who uses porn might think along the same lines: “I’m just watching video clips made by actors and actresses, not intentionally seeking digital interactions with a prostitute.”I agree, but motives only carry some of the weight when it comes to our moral decisions. The above slippery slope is not as much about motives as it is about the nature of the actions. Behind the making of pornography are real people really selling themselves for the sexual gratification of viewers.
The medium doesn’t change the fact that a prostituted woman was used for her body and sex appeal, no matter the viewer’s understanding of the act. This is why so many women say using porn feels like cheating: the act of seeking out another woman for sexual pleasure—even if she is hidden behind a veil of pixels and a sleazy acting agency—is not a movement towards faithfulness, but away from it.
Why cheating matters (and why it doesn’t)However, by saying that using porn is breaking a marriage vow, I am not prescribing a specific reaction we should have to it. The six- step slippery slope presents six different scenarios, each having their own gravity of offense.
They may all be cheating, but they all show different levels of intensity. We need to turn the tables on those who ask, “Is using porn cheating?” and address why it matters. For some, when they ask, “Is using porn cheating?” they bring a lot of baggage with the question. They think, “Since porn is cheating, I can never forgive you.” “Since porn is cheating, I have grounds to divorce you—and I will.” “Since porn is cheating, I will lash out and cheat on you.” These dispositions are, quite frankly, completely separate issues to address. To say a man has broken his marriage vow by seeking out porn is one thing.
To say that he cannot be forgiven, that he should be divorced, or that he deserves revenge are other matters altogether. For others, when they ask, “Is using porn cheating?” they simply want their spouse to know that when they said, “I do,” they expected a spirit of monogamy. Yes, the world is full of sexual temptations. Yes, they know their spouse is full of hormones and attracted to other people walking about in the world. But they expected to be the focus of their spouse’s sexual energy, attention, and devotion. When they vowed to “forsake all others,” that is what they promised and what they expected in return. The heart of the matter.
Two facts lie at the heart of the issue. First, people often desire the perks of marriage, but marriage vows are not taken seriously. As such, we find ourselves straddling two worlds. In one world, we embrace an idyllic picture of finding “the one,” growing old together, loving and serving another person until death we do part. In the other world, we enjoy the convenience and self- centeredness of solo- sex in front of the computer screen. These two worlds mix like oil and water in our miry hearts.
Before long, you will either have to abandon pornography or abandon a genuine spirit of monogamy. Second, people have been blinded by the sense of distance the digital world places between ourselves and the real world. We believe something doesn’t count as much if it is “online” or “on television” or “just fantasy.” We rename offenses: stealing becomes downloading, cruelty becomes speaking one’s mind, and exploitation becomes entertainment. We have settled for what Chris Hedges calls an empire of illusion. It promotes masturbation,” Hedges writes.
Top 1. 0 Bible Studies 2. As we wrap up 2. 01. Bible studies of the year! These studies span topics that will strengthen your faith, draw you closer to God, and help you grow as a Christian in today's world. Whether you like to study on your own or in a group, these popular studies will infuse great wisdom into your daily Bible reading. Peter: Walk the Talk.
Transformation—the process of becoming holy—begins in your mind. Session Bible Study. Transformation—the process of becoming holy—begins in your mind.
We will see in this seven- session Bible study that the apostle Peter shows us how to begin to think differently, which will radically affect our behavior. We all make split- second decisions in any given moment to do right or wrong. To choose right, we must learn to be obedient to God, which will give us an appetite for being good.
This kind of obedience will create a radical change in our relationships, so that our quality of life will improve. Finally, we will learn how to prepare for suffering that inevitably comes to everyone, as we trust a loving God who has promised to take care of us. Bible Study Basics: The Letters of John. Live out the message of Jesus.
Multi Session Bible Study. As time passed after Jesus' death and resurrection, the believers had an increasingly difficult time remembering his actual teachings. Believers from different places were preaching different messages. As fewer and fewer people who had spent time with Jesus in the flesh were alive to share their experiences, John wrote these three letters to clear up Jesus' teachings and to call believers back to his message.
The drift away from Jesus' message happens all too easily—even today—and we can all gain from John's wisdom. Learn how to stay true to Christ in a very gray world. What Does the Bible Say About Being Gay? Shining God's light of truth on a polarizing topic. Session Bible Study. In general, Christians have done a poor job of talking about sexuality, especially when it comes to same- sex orientation. For many, it's a taboo topic to avoid at all costs.
Others speak about it plenty, but they focus solely on truth without any love or grace. What does the Bible really say about being gay? And how should we respond to people who experience same- sex orientation? This study draws on three articles—two from Christianity Today and one from Her.
Experience God Every Day. A 4. 0- day journey to help you experience God's presence every day. Session Bible Study. It's easy to speed through life and never experience God's presence. We rush from meetings to social gatherings and from kids' games to church groups.
Often, as we crawl into bed at night, we realize we never met God during our day. We want more. We want to experience God's presence. We want to learn how to meet God in the everyday mess and chaos of life. Is it possible to experience God day- to- day? This 4. 0- day study will take you on a journey to experience God's presence every day. You'll assess your spiritual growth, learn about the spiritual journey God has for us, discover how to connect with God in the noise of life, and read stories of how God shows up even in the mundane activities.
Colossians: Against the Tide. The Book of Colossians teaches principles for living a Christian life in the midst of a non- Christian culture. Session Bible Study.